So, what Erikson’s stage are you in?

If you read my book or the early blogs you know I am in Erikson’s  Stage Eight.

Have you ever heard Johnny Nash sing “I Can See Clearly Now?”  I heard it for the first time in 1972 while I was driving and crying (Chapter Five).   Little did I know then, that it would be meaningful to me in 1993, in 2016, and again in 2018.

In 1993 the first lyric walked me into my Stage 7:

“I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,  I can see all obstacles in my way, Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind, It’s gonna be a bright, bright Sun-Shiny  day.”

I stopped crying, I assessed my obstacles, reclaimed my journey, and moved forward.

In 2016 the second lyric walked me into my Stage 8:

“I think I can make it now, the pain is gone, All of the bad feelings have disappeared, Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin’ for, It’s gonna be a bright, bright Sun-Shiny day.”

Today, in 2018 the song still follows me;  the third lyric inspires me to look for blue skies:

“Look all around, there’s nothin but blue skies, Look straight ahead, nothin’ but blue skies”

It’s funny how three lyrics written by someone else can seem to be a summary of your life. (1973 TV appearance – I Can See Clearly Now on You-Tube)

You can write in comments, I would like to hear what stage you are in. The stages are listed in my book, Perseverance of Yesterday’s Woman.

Do you have a song that makes you feel like the song is a summary of your life?

The Journey Begins

In anticipation of my new book, Perseverance of Yesterday’s Women, I thought it might be nice to share with my readers the inspiration behind Perseverance of Yesterday’s Women and what it means to be able to write a book such as this.

On October 23, 2016, I  reached that stage, shall we call it that wisdom stage. Erik Erikson, (1902-1994) a developmental psychologist and psychoanalyst known for his theory on psychosocial development, believed 8 stages of development unfold as we go through the lifespan and that each stage consists of a unique developmental task that confronts individuals with a change that must be faced, so in that scheme I realized I was in the 7th stage and well on my way to the 8th stage.

The task and choice in Stage 7 was Generativity vs. Stagnation. Mercy, that choice was daunting to think about. I wasn’t sure about Generativity, but I knew Stagnation was not good – I pictured a rocking chair and a condo too warm for anyone to visit for too long. Looking into Generativity I realized this is the route I would have to take to outrun stagnation.

A sense of urgency seeped into my soul and the book began to form.

I set out to learn what I would have to do to live up to Generativity and positively exit stage 7… according to Erikson my chief concern in this stage was to assist the younger generation in developing and leading useful lives.

As I began to examine my life I realized I was good to go towards the next and final stage 8,  Integrity vs. Despair. This stage involves reflecting on the past either piecing together a positive review or concluding that one’s life has not been well spent. Hmm,  Stage 8 sounded a bit scarier. At first, I worried about this piecing together step…my life was full of challenges, loss, despair, accomplishment, gains, and joy all so scrambled that I wasn’t sure I could make that assessment.

After much toiling I realized I was right,  it was worse, and that I could not assess my life without beginning my examination of my life from its beginning. The more I began to reflect on my life’s events it became apparent that my life’s journey was like a child crawling, walking, running, scrambling, falling and rising all at an alarming pace;  pain mixed with joy, betrayal mixed with love and loyalty, achievement mixed with failure…thank goodness for Erikson’s stages.

Perseverance prevailed; with each stage, a chapter was born.

I began what was initially a painful process, then an anxious process, a challenging process, and suddenly when I came to Stage 8, I was able to separate joy and achievements from pain and betrayals. I was able to recognize the good and kind, from evil and destructive people.

Join me on this adventure, sort your stages.  It is possible to go back and fulfill the needs of the stages you missed; it will strengthen you, it might even delight you.

Stay tuned for more information and an official release date for my book, Perseverance of Yesterday’sWomen.

By Dragana Djurdjev